Based on the excerpt, explain why it took many years for hamburgers to become popular in the United States. Support your answer with important and specific information from the excerpt.
(The excerpt was handed out on Monday: "The Pioneers" by Eric Schlosser and Charles Wilson.)
Think about what we have discussed in class, and utilize the rubric below to help evaluate the student's response. You must state whether the student should receive a 1, 2, 3, or 4 and explain why. Your evaluation must be at least 5 sentences long. You may respond to another classmate's post and tell whether or not you agree with their scoring and why or why not.
Your post is due no later than Friday at 5 pm.
The Student's Response
Scoring Guide and Sample
| Score | Description |
|---|---|
| (4) | The response is a clear, complete, and accurate explanation of why it took many years for hamburgers to become popular in the United States. The response includes important and specific information from the excerpt |
| (3) | The response is a mostly clear, complete, and accurate explanation of why it took many years for hamburgers to become popular in the United States. The response includes important but often general information from the excerpt. |
| (2) | The response is a partial explanation of why it took many years for hamburgers to become popular in the United States. The response includes limited information from the excerpt and may include misinterpretations. |
| (1) |
The response is a
minimal explanation of why it took many years for hamburgers to become
popular in the United States. The response includes little or no
information from the excerpt and may include misinterpretations.
OR
The response relates minimally to the task. |
| (0) | The response is totally incorrect or irrelevant, or contains insufficient evidence to demonstrate comprehension. |
I think that this person who wrote the paragraph deserves a two because they did not explain how hamburgers became popular in the united states. They used one sentence from the story to support their answer and that’s not enough. However, they explained their answer but their answer was not from the text.
ReplyDeleteI think this person deserves a two. They told some information about the story but not enough. Also they didn't use good grammer. They didn't have a conclusion and their topic sentence included a detail, which in a topic sentence you are not supposed to include. Thats why I think they should get a two.
ReplyDeleteIf I were the teacher I would give the student's response a3. I chose this score for a couple of reasons. The student took important information from the excerpt and correctly quoted it in the response. The student also used general information, and had a few spelling mistakes. The student did a good jod on his response, but could use a little improvement.
ReplyDeleteIf I was the teacher I would give the kid a 2. I disagree with Crystal because the important details were not shown. The answer was not clear and lacked comman ELA skills like spelling and grammer. Thirdly, the answer ended randomly and without meaning. In conclusion a 2 is a good grade for a irrelivent answer to the passage.
DeleteI think the person that wrote this would of got a one or a two. They didn't really explain or have a thesis on how hamburgers became popular in the United States or how they did. He/she only used one quotation from the story and didn't really hook me or make sense. If they added more details or information from the story to their paper, and proofread it to make it better they might of been able to get a three. They didn't really hook me in and it didn't make sense to me a lot.
ReplyDeleteI give this person a 2.I give him a 2 because he wasn’t clear and didn’t put enough information in his response of why hamburgers didn’t become popular easily.Also, he said something that wasn’t even stated in the story like” murders started using ground beef to kill people”.I don’t think people would do that and try to make people die.Some words are misspelled.But, I give him credit for his response because something in his response were true like “people assumed that the meat was dirty and made from rotten old meat full of chemical preservatives”.That is found in stanza 5.But this response would have even been better if he proof-read it.
ReplyDeleteI would give this student a 2 because he did not have a strong thesis. Also, he did not write enough details or enough evidence.
ReplyDeleteIf I could grade this students MCAS essay, I would give them a 1 or a 2 (same as everyone else). Why I say this is because sure, this person explained some detail, but I wanted more. And I think that this person could do/write a lot more. I also didn't see a thesis. If there was a thesis, it wasn't clear at all. Those parts are the reason I would give this person a 1. However, what I did like about his essay was that this person did have back-up evidence for the details. For instance, this person said "On paragraph 9, the story says 'The hamburgers reputation wasn't helping at the time when the murderers starting using ground beef to poison people'." They used connections which helped the grade boost up which made me possibly, give them a 2. Those are the reasons why I would give this student a 1 or a 2 on their MCAS score.
ReplyDeleteIf I were a teacher and I had to grade this open response I would give this student a 1. The reason why I would give this student a 1 is because his\her thesis was not strong and I did not understand it that well. In addition, I would not choose a four, but I would choose a one because their evidence is not that clear. Lastly, the anonymous person that wrote the paragraph did not have enough evidence to support their detail. Therefore, I gave this student a 1.
ReplyDeleteIf I were a teacher that had to grade this open response I would give this student a two. I would give them a two because it didn't have enough detail to back the answer up. Therefore,they did give a quote from the passage which is one of the reasons I gave them a two. The topic sentence isn't worded right and the conclusion sentence isn't a very good one. Near did they use any transition words, and spelt some words wrong. The information was very limited and didn't have a thesis! Clearly, as explained in the information above this student deserves a two.
ReplyDeleteI gave this student a one because she did not describe how hamburgers became popular in the U.S. Instead, this student gave several reasons from the except of why hamburgers did not become popular. This student talked about poison in burgers, then talked about how the meat was dirty and full of chemicals. Also the student ended the paragraph with misinformation. Also there was mention of poor people eating this food in the 1900’s. This student never answered how hamburgers became popular just the bad things before it became popular. Lastly, this student did not proof read. There for I gave this student a one.
ReplyDeleteIf I was grading this paper I would give it a 1 because the student did not have back up evidence for the supporting details. Also, Their thesis wasn't strong or clear. He/she didn't add a conclusion and a begin statment. In addition, the essay wasn't well proof-read Because I caught a lot of mistakes. Clearly, I would give this person a one because there was little to no evidence.
ReplyDeleteI would give this student a 2.5 because he had a good idea of what to do it was just a little to messy to read and it was not enough wrighting.The student did not really add a lot af evidence or hav a good thesis.I also saw a lot of mistakes too.I would give this person a 2.5
ReplyDeleteI would give this student a 2.5 because he had a good idea of what to do it was just a little to messy to read and it was not enough writing.I agree he or she did not spell somethings right i think he or she had good idea.
ReplyDeleteThe student grade would be a 2. The student deserves a 2 because he did not have enough detail in the paragraph. It was hard to understand the paragraph because he mixed up a lot of the ideas. The student did not end the paragraph good also it was confusing.
ReplyDeleteI believe that the person that made this essay had a good thought but didn't have the information needed to get a 4. This statement only includes a little bit of what the story was trying to tell us like when this person told us that people put poison in there burgers even though it was only murderers that did that. It not only included limited information it also had very messy hand writing. It would've been better if they talked more about Charlie Nagreen because he was the inventor of the hamburger and therefore I give this essay a 2.
ReplyDeleteIf I were a teacher and read this through I would give it a 2 out of 4. I believe this student earned a 2 for many reasons. First of all they did put in a quote which improved the quality of the work a little bit but but it was not impressive in other ways. The response is lacking neatness of work and spelling. In part of the response i couldn’t understand what it was saying which also means it was lacking editing and proof reading. This student did do a fair job with the excerpt. In the end this student deserves a 2 of 4.
ReplyDeleteIf I were a teacher and read this through I would give it a 2 out of 4. I believe this student earned a 2 for many reasons. First of all they did put in a quote which improved the quality of the work a little bit but but it was not impressive in other ways. The response is lacking neatness of work and spelling. In part of the response i couldn’t understand what it was saying which also means it was lacking editing and proof reading. This student did do a fair job with the excerpt. In the end this student deserves a 2 of 4.
ReplyDeleteI would give this person a 3 because he didn’t have a thesis or any details or evidence to back things up. This persons righting wasn’t that great it was hard to read. It looked like on big sentence. This person have could have done a nice job but didn’t put any thing into it.
ReplyDelete